keep the change (with special correspondent dan!)

mo: someone is an idiot
Dan: Me?
mo: no! the system man
my boss is though
i'm doing her expenses - she left a .80 tip
come on. really?
you can't just throw down a dollar
Dan: You always leave at least a dollar
Can't go lower than a dollar
I don't like people who leave cents in general.
Round it up!
mo: that's just shit
Dan: Is the waitress a hobo?
She needs bills
mo: did she have an empty paper coffee cup in front of her as she came over?
Dan: Was she blind and playing the accordian?
mo: was she trying to sell you skittles?
Dan: Did she have a bindle and a toe sticking out of the hole in her shoe and a beat up top hat and was she with a very scruffy, skinny dog?
mo: did she have a i served in the vietnam war and all i have got for it was this empty pant leg tshit and was she on a skateboard?
Dan: Did she and three black dudes sing "Under the Boardwalk" in three part harmony?
mo: was she holding an infant with a lot of track marks on her arm saying she was cleaned up and wanted to get off the system with your help?

Dan: She did none of things? Then don't leave $3.11
It's fucking insulting man