Second Heaven

sare: I like when people refer to each other as Big Shot

mo: you want me to change your name from sare to big shot
because i will

sare: no, i'm just saying

mo: and then, every time you see your name
it will make you happy for once

sare: you ARE a loose cannon

mo: and it won't have anything to do with anything

sare: oh snap

mo: and all the times in high school when you felt small will be eradicated

sare: I am a big shot.

mo: you are
i'm like G*d here
just making your life perfect and you don't even appreciate it
i know how G*d feels

sare: i know how G*d smells
like chicken wings.

mo: and matches

sare: so bitey!

mo: sulfur, which is the height of irony

sare: right? 'cause you're like "is that brimstone?"
and you're like, "nope, sulfur!"
people don't know if they're going up or down!

mo: and you just shake your head when you realize, it's just G*d

sare: and then it's like "so when can I have some chicken wings?"
is there food in heaven?

mo: is there food in heaven?
is there FOOD in heaven?
man, there better be

sare: IS there food in heaven?

mo: of course!

sare: good
i will eat so many donuts.

mo: you know what they have besides donuts?
taco bells on every corner

sare: is there heart disease i heaven? the answer is probably NO.

mo: where would you go if you died of it?
heaven the sequel?

sare: there is a second heaven!
better restaurants

mo: dijon restaurants

sare: and when people came up from the first heaven you could totally act superior

mo: because you have died TWICE! suck it, bitches

sare: dying in heaven is like being famous
actually, wouldn't it be kind of annoying?

mo: but 15 min of fame is like an eternity

sare: like everybody is like "Seen it. Attention whore."

mo: some famous people say that being famous is annoying

sare: this is true
i bet there are not as many starbucks in heaven.

mo: THERE.ARE.NO.STARBUCKS.

sare: as there are in my neighborhood

mo: maybe in a certain corner

sare: just the smell from time to time
when you can smell the coffee and not chicken wings, you know god is not with you

mo: maybe in heaven you only see the stuff that makes you happy
you also smell whatever you want for your G*d
personally, matches & chicken wings totally make me happy

sare: so we're all set.

mo: but maybe a Muslim smells um, pita bread
and hummus